I don't think I am ready to be in a relationship.
I just can't deal with the expectations and hopes
that both parties put in together.
So many small stuffs get twisted and do not know which side should be blamed on.
Missing him is one thing, could not hug him is another thing, expect him to be by my side is the third thing, receiving unanswered call is pissing me off, creates another thing that affects those things which have existed.
See... how complicated it is???

I do not know whether it's me who's being so complicated or it's him who always demands to be understood.
I do not know whether this is called love or infatuation.
I do not know whether my logic and feeling are in sync.
I do not know all the said words were truly from my heart, brain or ego.
I do not know whether I will not disappoint anyone.
I do not know whether I still have a heart to be broken.
I do not know whether I am good enough for him.
I do not know whether I deserve to be treated this way.

I am lost...

Him.. Finally..

Karma is the eternal assertion of human freedom...
our thoughts, our words, and deeds are the threads
of the net which we throw around ourselves. – Swami Vivekananda

Patience is something I really believe in that
one day you will be paid back
It happened to me through him
He is just a creature, a beautiful one, that is really hard to be described
He's just genuine and sincere
I still cannot believe that I am now with him
The moments were just too glory and joyful
He's too good to be true
He's kinda matured and calm
That's what I like about him
He's exceptionally funny and sweet
He's so expressive and honest
The most important thing that he's just sooo into me
Hahahaha...

Yea it's him, A.M.G
Love u always,...

Aaaaaa I am finally falling in love.

Him.. with a code "I am always willing"

I was sipping my orange juice
waiting for my friend to catch lunch up with me
U were far beyond this country
I missed you, and still do til now

To me, you are such an angel,
suddenly fell from the sky above
Every single thing you have done
was really genuine and sincere
I do know that you do not expect anything
I can tell from your eyes, from anything
we have gone through

And suddenly you called
With that calming voice
you asked me how I was
I asked you back how you were
You asked me what I wanted from there
I replied that I did not know
You said you would get something for me
I said it was all up to you
Anything given from you, I would appreciate

Gosh, I miss you
Cannot wait until you come back
and have our quality time

Let's get the party started...

I have no clue..

I do not know what I have been doing lately
I do not know whether I was out of track..
or this is the thing that I should do
to move me from one point to another point

I do not regret anything
But I am wondering,
"Was it me?"
Yea, it was me
Me who was acting stupidly weird

How could I have done something like that?
But it was all good
I got the message
I know how it felt
I understand how bad it was
I am aware how stupid I was
I learn how dangerous it could be
and I could be

I am still in lala land
Even when I was sleeping,
so many things were around
So many voices stuffed my ears
The feeling sucked
I was imagining thousand conversations,
simultaneously
I talked loudly
No one was around

I do not want to wreck my brains
It is God's gift

What I could say right this moment is just...
Sorry to go through all this
I wish this is gonna be a lesson for me
It must be

........